Tuesday, August 28, 2007

To an absent friend...

Tommy Spinks

Oct. 29, 1948-Aug. 26, 2007.

Friday, August 24, 2007

Wiffle and such, (or) 'That's what I'M talkin' about!'

Wrote a column in The Times about wiffle ball Sunday --- "Goodbye to TreeCom" --- and prompted several emails of note, including this one forwarded to me after former Shreveporter Randy Sowers, early-30ish, now of Houston, read the effort and was, as you will see, inspired...I loved this. I love even more that he'd mailed it to his aunt...

From Randy...

We use to play a white trash version of wiffle called tape ball. This is where you take left over duct, masking, whatever and roll it into many tiny little balls but use the wiffle bat. The great thing about tape ball is:

1) A roll of tape was cheaper than a full wiffle set. You could not buy just the ball you had to buy the bat and the ball so when someone hit a home run or we broke the ball we were screwed

2) since each was individually made they all flew different. Some balls were better than others some fell a part as soon as you hit them...giving you that Roy Hobbs knock the cover off feeling

3) you could play on less earth as the tape balls would not fly as far

Tape ball cannot be played in the rain....for obvious reasons of cheap glue. As we got older basketball took its place. You did not have to make your own equipment in this sport. In high school there was an elementary school down the road which had a black top surface and a full court outdoor and uncovered. If you do not know what a black top surface is...it is a mixture of tar and lava as I swear in the summers the court would literally melt the rubber on your shoes!

The goals were not regulation height as it was an elementary school..so all the rival high schools in the area would show up and play each other all summer long. It became quite a spectacle. Since the goals were shorter it also became a dunk fest and we had to modify the rules. Goal tending was LEGAL, fouling was legal, there was no out of bounds, who ever got to the ball first it was theirs. This type of game played on the surface of the sun with guerrilla style strategy to win produced some of the most (forgive the pun) heated battles that have ever been fought between the iron rims.

That is one of my most vivid memories as a youth. Playing on that court all day long! We played in the playoffs during the season, I went to prom, kissed girls...but Theis Elementary Black top court, where the goals were only 9 feet and the temp was 200 was my best and worst memories growing up!!!

So I can relate total to teddy...

Wednesday, August 22, 2007

My man is first at 3rd

On the 50th anniversary of major league baseball's Gold Glove awards, fans voted online for the alltime Gold Glove team.

My man got more votes than anyone.

The story is on espn.com today; here's my favorite graph.

"(Brooks) Robinson drew the highest vote total of any player with 61 percent. He won a record-tying 16 Gold Gloves at third base for Baltimore and was the MVP of the 1970 World Series, largely because of his diving stops, backhanded plays and accurate throws."

How beautiful is that? And 23 seasons with one club, the Baltimore Orioles.

Here's the team:
1B: Wes Parker, (Dodgers, the surprise pick. Beat out Mattingly and Keith Hernandez, who has a record 11 Gold Gloves at the position.)
2B: Joe Morgan.
3B: Brooks Robinson (I shouldn't even have to write that.)
SS: Ozzie Smith
OF: Clemente, Mays and Griffey Jr.
C: Johnny Bench
P: Maddux, (who like Robinson and Jim Kaat, has 16 Gold Gloves.)

More from the espn.com story: "The nine winners have combined to earn 100 Gold Gloves, which are chosen annually by major league managers and coaches. ... Nearly 1 million votes for the all-time team were received online, through the mail and in person at sporting goods stores."

Monday, August 20, 2007

We're back in business...

Had eight days off, all in a row, for the first time in forever. Won a trip for 8 days to Vegas. Not the nights, just the days. I asked the contest people what we were supposed to do during the nights and the nice lady said, "I don't know, but just make sure you stay your butt out of Las Vegas."

Actually, the trip was to the Redneck Riviera, which I am surprised that a lot of people don't know is another name for Alabama's Gulf Coast, your Orange Beach and Gulf Shores. I am not going to express here how much I love the Redneck Riviera but I will say that it's a lot. I saw a dolphin jump!

Sadly, no one won last week's contest. So I'll give you an easy one today, try to get you back on the ball, see if you can hold down a little soft but solid food. I saw this episode last night while I was eating my nightly before-bedtime cereal.

The winning answer is the one that best qualifies this statement from The Andy Griffith Show. And that is it for today because I am way behind, and looking for a bucket of my own.

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Out in the cornfield, and back in the day...

Back in the 1970s, Linda Brown of Ft. Worth -- a dedicated reader of the Teddy column and blog, so we really like her a lot -- won a "Share a Joke" contest and got to Live The Dream -- an appearance on Hee Haw!

She has the pictures to prove it.

One is of her and Gordie Tapp (I have not thought about Gordie Tapp in YEARS! -- he was beautiful as Lavern, the hen-pecked husband of Ida Lee Nagger ) and the other is of her and Eddie Rabbitt.

She and other winners got to be in the cornfield and tell the joke that got them on the show. Here's her brief account -- and we thank her again for sharing these pictures...They're wonderful. I'd have loved to have seen my Hee Haw backstage...


At the time I was living in Colorado Springs so Goober's line was:
"This is Linda Brown from Colorado Springs. Have you lived there all your life?"
Says me, "Not yet."
And there it is, my big Hee Haw moment!
Goober was brilliant. He asked us our jokes, off camera, and all were too long so off the top of his head he gave us all one liners. He was so nice...just like you'd want the Goob to be. That was a fun trip because we also got to go to the Country Music Awards Banquet and met a lot of biggies there.

Wednesday, August 8, 2007

'Here, boy. Here's a treat for you. C'mon boy!...'

Hud sent me this and it's a beautiful thing. More info is at this link...


or Google "Vick Chew Toy." It's a little chew toy for dogs and it looks like Atlanta QB Michael Vick, under investigating for dog fighting and dog killing.

Q: What do you call a dog with four legs and one arm?
A: A pit bull.


Monday, August 6, 2007

"Hi Mr. Douglas!..."

Tom Lester (hired hand and country bumpkin EB DAWSON on the "GREEN ACRES" television show -- will be preaching and speaking at Fellowship United Methodist in Bossier City Sunday, August 12, at 8:45 a.m., 11:00 a.m. and 2:00 p.m. -- if he gets through with the plowing in time.

Thursday, August 2, 2007

'Karen Valentine to block...'

'...and circle gets the square!'

TA NOTE: You’ve got to love your Hollywood Squares. Paul Lynde was the grestest center square ever. On the Web – Google Hollywood Squares – there are two long, long pages of his answers alone. I couldn’t look at them all in one day … made my head hurt. This is a collection that’s circulated for years…

Subject: Hollywood Squares
If you remember the Original Hollywood Squares and its comics, this
may bring a tear to your eye! These great questions and answers are
from the days when "Hollywood Squares" game show responses were
spontaneous, not scripted. Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course.

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q. If you're going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should
you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q. You've been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man
or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That's what's been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet t a stranger at a party
and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask
him if he's married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.

Q. Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say "I Love You"?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q. What are "Do It," "I Can Help," and "I Can't Get Enough"?
A. George Gobel: I don't know, but it's coming from the next

Q. As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your
hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and
I'll give you a gesture you'll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell's Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q. Charley, you've just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I'm too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what's a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist
camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I'm always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a
goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q. If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting
into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn't neglected.

Q. Back in the old days , when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his
head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q. When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I'll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them
and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do
in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh